Saturday, September 10, 2011

Story-A-Day #303: Gut Buster


He was tired, grumpy, and under the weather. He was pretty sure this despicable trifecta had predisposed his day to a miserable conclusion, that he would ride out the afternoon on a tide of angst and bitterness.

That had been in the morning, but now he was at work, slogging away through another uneventful Saturday shift. He didn't expect things to take a sudden turn for the ridiculous, but one little squeaked fart can redefine an entire day.

He was in his office, and hadn't noticed his cohort slipping through the door and so, cheek raised, he let off a rumbling flapper that vibrated sonorously across the leather seat. What was meant to be a small moment of personal release soon turned into a shared fit of convulsive laughter with the simple, shocked utterance of a single word: "Dude!"

He turned quickly towards the door. "Hey," he offered as greeting. "Didn't see you there."

They both started laughing, a little awkwardly at first, then with great evolving rolling guffaws that soon stole their breath away. Tears streaming down their faces, they hunched over in silent, full body laughter. With every quivering shudder, his skull exploded. Through pained gasps, his coworker moaned about his busting gut.

They finally regained their composure, gasping for air. They panted ferociously for a moment, choking on their words as they tried to recap the ridiculous moment, before finally giving up altogether.

They had just regained their composure, had finally settle back down, when a quick smack of butt cheeks echoed through the room.

That one small gesture was enough to nearly kill them.

He threw on his coat and exited to the street, staring at the sidewalk through a sheen of joyful tears. He watched his jacket zipper bounce above his shoes and wept.

No matter the age, a fart was always funny.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone. Please excuse auto corrected errors!

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